Family Work

"Successful marriages and families are established and maintained on principles of . . . work."

The Family: A Proclamation to the World

The Meanings and Blessings of Family Work

Kathleen Slaugh Bahr, Kristine Manwaring, Cheri Loveless, and Erika Bailey Bahr

1. We must leave the ease of Eden to follow the Savior.

"Family work provides endless opportunities to recognize and fill others' needs." It allows us to become more like Christ.

2. Prosaic (ordinary, day-to-day) work connects people and changes hearts.

Alma 37:6 reads, " by small and simple things are great things brought to pass." Work is associated with many negative things. An ideal life is considered work-free. Work is often seen as mindless, menial, and even demeaning. People often complain and fight about work. But, it's when we work that we can truly become like the Savior, putting others' needs before our own.

3. Prosaic work was once the norm.

Work was life. Families worked together to obtain the necessities of life. With industrialization, father's left the home and the family. This began the separation of family and work. The work of mothers and children also changed. The mother's workday was extended and she began to carry the heavy load of more responsibilities and more expectations. For a time, children left home to work in factories. Child labor laws ended child labor, which shifted the roles of children from laborer to pampered consumer.

4. Managing our homes like a business may be a faulty ideal.

"[P]lans too easily become ends rather than means, with end products overshadowing the shared creative process that produced them." Look at family work from an eternal perspective instead of from an economic or efficient perspective. Family work provides opportunities for each member of the family to serve one another, spend time together, and to learn to work together as a team. It should be more than just accomplishing a task.

5. Parents do not need a perfect system for doing chores.

Family work can unify hearts within a family. It should be based on love and service. Once when President Henry B. Eyring and his wife were rushing and under a lot of stress, he asked his wife what he could to do help. He said, "There was - I made the bed. It was such a small thing that I'm sure it doesn't sound very impressive to you, and it probably wasn't very impressive to her either. I could have done more. But as I did that simple little thing . . . when I gave of my time in a way I thought the Savior would want me to for my wife, not only did my love for her increase - I also felt his love for her. I promise you that if you'll use your gifts to serve someone else, you'll feel the Lord's love for that person."

6. All family members are vital to family work.

Parents should have high expectations for their children's participation in family work. Even toddlers can be given responsibilities appropriate for their age. It may take extra work for the parents to let children work, but it is valuable work. Mothers set the tone for family work and fathers set an example for participating in household chores.

7. Family work becomes a joyful blessing when not seen as a burden.

"Daily rituals . . . are the glue that can bind families together."

How can you use work to increase love and joy in your family?

Personal Application
With my group, I shared some of the family work I did growing up, including making homemade pizza together every Sunday. I shared that I want to focus on making our family work a group effort with less focus on checking items off on a to do list. I want my kids to learn to work together and to learn to serve each other. I think we’ll start by making Sunday dinners together. 

Resource:

Hawkins, A. J., Dollahite, D. C., & Draper, T. (2012). Successful marriages and families: proclamation principles and research perspectives. Provo, UT: BYU Studies and School of Family Life, Brigham Young University.